How to Deliver Feedback That Inspires: 19 Words You Need

career confidence confidence effective communication feedback leadership performance improvement professional growth Jul 30, 2024
Business woman scarily walking balancing as she is walking across the proverbial spoon that is rested on top of a coffee cup, filled with hot steaming coffee. The image invokes the feeling many leaders experience as they prepare to deliver feedback. Too harsh and they demotivate; too soft and they won't inspire change. The overlay text says,
Grant Yourself the Power of these 19 Words the next time you Deliver Feedback to your Team

 

As a mentor and leader, delivering feedback can often feel like walking a tightrope.

  • Too harsh, and you risk demotivating those you aim to uplift. 
  • Too soft, and the message may not drive the necessary improvement.

We all dream of delivering feedback with grace and positivity, but let's be real—sometimes, we just don't know how to pull it off.

Until now.

Adam Grant, an organizational psychologist and best-selling author, offers a simple yet profoundly effective approach to this delicate task.

He shares that research shows using just 19 words can make your feedback dramatically more receptive:

“I’m giving you these comments because I have very high expectations and I’m confident that you can reach them.”

This week, let’s explore why this works and how to integrate this wisdom into our feedback practices, enhancing both the impact and reception of our constructive criticism.

 

 

WHY IT WORKS

 

The Power of High Expectations  

When you start with “I’m giving you these comments because I have very high expectations,” you set a positive and ambitious tone.

High expectations signal belief in the person’s potential and capabilities.

It’s a powerful message: you see them not just as they are, but also as they can be.

This inspires confidence and drives individuals to rise to the occasion.

 

It transforms feedback from a critique of past performance into a vision of future excellence.

 

Belief in Their Abilities Inspires Confidence

Following up with “and I’m confident that you can reach them” reinforces your belief in their potential.

This part of the statement does wonders for motivation.

It assures them that the feedback isn’t a reflection of their inadequacies but a tool for growth.

This confidence is infectious.  

 

When people feel trusted and supported, they are more likely to embrace the feedback and work towards improvement with renewed vigor.

 

 

HOW IT WORKS

 

Practical Application in Feedback

 

Let’s break down how to effectively use this approach in real-world scenarios:

  1. Specificity is the Key

    While the 19-word phrase sets the stage, specificity is crucial.

    Clearly outline what needs to be improved and provide actionable steps.

    For instance, “I noticed that in the open of your recent presentation, you struggled with engaging the audience. I believe that with some practice on storytelling techniques, you can capture their attention more effectively.”

  2. Balanced Feedback

    Combine positive reinforcement with constructive criticism.

    Acknowledge what they are doing well and encourage them to use those strengths to grow in this particular area of feedback.

    For example, “Your research was thorough and insightful.  With a bit more focus on delivery of storytelling, your presentations will be outstanding.”

  3. Ongoing Support

    Make it clear that feedback is part of an ongoing process and that you are there to support their journey.

    Offer resources, additional training, or regular check-ins to help them progress.

    “I’m here to help you with any resources or practice sessions you might need.  What do you think is the best next step for you to grow in storytelling?”

 

 

[Trying out this new Feedback-Starter Phrase can Feel like a Scary First Step. It is worth the effort!]

 

LEADING WITH THOUGHTFUL FEEDBACK

Incorporating Adam Grant’s 19-word wisdom can transform your approach to feedback.

It’s a small shift with a significant impact. So, next time you find yourself in a position to give feedback, remember to set those high expectations, express your confidence, and watch as your team rises to the challenge with renewed energy and enthusiasm.

 

Wanna see this powerful 19-word feedback game-changer in action?

Here we go!

“ Hello Thoughtful Leader,

I’m giving you these comments because I have very high expectations and I’m confident that you can reach them.

I believe in you and your ability to lead with empathy and strength while providing powerful feedback to those you mentor and lead.

You continue to invest in your growth and strengthen your unique value in this world as a leader.  After all, that is exactly why you are reading this article from me to you, right now.

I invite you to practice this 19-word feedback-starter this week.  By framing your feedback with high expectations and unwavering confidence, you will create an environment of trust and growth.

You’ve got this.

And I am here to support you as you continue to step into your greatest leadership self by continuing to write these articles weekly.  Email me anytime with questions.”

 

 

[The Peace and Positive Impact of Transformative Feedback]

 

How does that feel? Are you inspired? Do you feel motivated to try this new method of delivering feedback?

Let’s lead with intention, inspire with our words, and build a community where everyone can thrive.

Ready to implement this strategy? Share your experiences or questions in the comments below.

Let’s grow together and inspire excellence in every interaction.

Make it a joyous and productive day!

Nicole